FOLLOW AFTER

Part II

The disciples had to be weaned from the bodily presence of Christ, and He discovered unto them that they missed the Holy Spirit. Take good notice, my friends, that Christ discovered unto them what they were lacking. Not one soul knows what he is lacking until they receive light in it. The want became unbearable and therefore they received the promise of the Holy Spirit already before Christ departed from them. But they were not able to ascend to that privilege by themselves. They had to stay and wait in Jerusalem until they would receive the power of the Holy Spirit as a free gift from above. They became more and more dependent. Yes, that is and becomes the life of those quickened people. And what a wonder it becomes then, that we have not been consumed by the fire of enmity, nor drowned in the waters of despondency. We are so eager to perceive it, and we cannot perceive it. The Lord draws a curtain over it to try those that are His. Those people must learn to live by faith, for then they will need the Lord more and more. They do not have a supply of themselves, as the Christendom of today, and so they must continually be prepared by the Spirit of God so that they may exercise faith: prevenient, accompanying and following grace.

In themselves they are so insusceptible and unfruitful, without need and without impressions. Destruction hath no covering, Job 26:6. If God Himself did not return time and again, and Christ did not ask after His sheep, what would then be their end? Of themselves they can only close and lock the doors. There is no expectation from them. Still all those uncoverings and experiences are necessary, to teach them that they are saved only by grace; saved because it is God’s will; because God has willed it, and that only in a Triune God lies the firmness and assurance of their salvation. Those people are rich in God, but not in themselves. The wonder that God still comes back in their life becomes continually greater, because they are at their wit’s end. They need God in order to have a true need of God. They are cut off from everything, and come to an end with themselves so that they may be accepted by God and find their life only in Christ. And then the older they become, the more dependent, the nearer to hell, but also the nearer to heaven. But that must be learned, otherwise we cannot understand it. Christ also instructed His disciples in it and especially Peter. After the risen and exalted Christ had restored His apostle in his office at the sea of Tiberias, which he had forfeited and of which he had made himself unworthy and had entrusted the care of the church to him, He said unto him: “Verily, verily, I say unto you, when thou wast young, thou girdest thyself, and walkedst whither thou wouldest: but when thou shalt be old, thou shalt stretch forth thy hands, and another shall gird thee, and carry thee whither thou wouldest not” (John 21). Christ uses the example here of an old blind, helpless man, who can no longer help himself; who must be led and who can no longer dress himself, but who with all his misery makes himself more miserable, because his will and character are not yet dead.

I will not enlarge upon this any further, because then I will have to help myself with the contemplation of what I have seen and heard of it; but without personal knowledge, because until this very moment I can still go in and out, and have not yet been brought under the care of a rest home.

If Samson still lived he could tell us more about how that is experienced. Also, Peter did not remain a stranger of that in his old age. Only one more remark; through all these ways it continually becomes a greater wonder for those who may be in that school, that God does not yet forsake them. They not only know what grace is, but also what free grace is. How firm, how unchangeably firm is the good pleasure of God in Christ, for a people who have learned to hate their life in this world (John 12:25), and who will learn to despise themselves. Here it is but a school for learning, and it remains a school for learning until the end. We are never finished with learning on this side of the grave. And we never have diplomas to display. But it will be an eternal wonder if we may get the lowest and least place in the school of Jesus, and yet never be expelled from that school.

Continually, we are more and more dependent until the last second of our life here upon earth, until that which is perfect is come, then God shall be all in all. And now the question for every one of us is, whether we also by grace know something of that dependent life. If we are strangers of this, then we are also strangers of divine life. Many think themselves blessed and place themselves on the side of God’s people without ever having stood outside. Oh, if the work of God has never been glorified in us, then it soon will be: “I have never known thee.” Just think about it with sorrow: we cannot make that dependent life ourselves. We must be quickened from the dead by God, to be able to exercise that dependent life. Only the Lord can give us that. But if we may know something about this through grace, how often must the Lord then still open ways for us, so that we shall need Him. Often we can see that in the life of the Bible saints. Our nature stands in enmity against such a dependent life. But it is grace from heaven, if the Lord will hedge up our way with thorns, and make a wall, that we shall not find our paths. We have the precious Psalms of David when he was in the cave, and when he was brought into distress. Jonah’s life was more profitable under the water than upon land. And thus we could go on. Just listen to David in Ps. 86: (Psalter No. 233:4) “O Lord, incline Thy ear to me, my voice of supplication heed; In trouble I will cry to Thee, For Thou shalt answer when I plead.” And then the poet says in Ps. 136 (Psalter 377:6):

“He thought on us amid our woes,
He rescued us form all our foes,
His tender mercies ever sure
To all eternity endure.”

Oh what a privilege if we do not lose that life of dependency. There can be so many reasons why we for awhile can go on without that close life at the Throne of God. So much can come between that we forget, leave and forsake God. But then we are brought under the displeasure of God and the Lord will hide His face from us. That the Lord would discover unto us the maladies and plagues of our heart. That the Lord would shut all doors for us here, so that we might find an open door in heaven as John did upon Patmos. May the Lord out of free grace give us a dependent life, so that Christ may be more and more glorified in us. May the love of God often fill our heart, and that the comforting communion of the Holy Ghost may be our portion, more and more.

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